Lessons with Lola
Lesson One of my C-PTSD Recovery Journey: Be Present
Four years ago when I first started walking Lola (thanks COVID), I saw it as a way to stay fit, get outdoors, and get my steps in (anyone else trying to fit one mile in less than 15?). It was a way to be productive. And it was a way to test my patience, apparently.
Lola was a puller. On her bad days, she still is. A shelter dog, she’s very anxious (the irony isn’t not lost on me). She rushes at other dogs, whines a lot, and gets easily distracted. For me, that meant running out of my non-existent patience.
I was always checking my watch, comparing my steps, and thinking about everything I needed to do when we got back. I was never really present at the park with Lola. And when I was, it was usually because I was annoyed at her.
Ironically, this was Lola during this morning's walk. It's almost like she's a paid actress with the timing of this post.Over time (and with more Lola lessons), I learned that the best way to have patience AND fully “maximize” my walk was by just being present. I started feeling the sun on my skin, the breeze in my hair, and the birds singing. I’ve been able to see more hummingbirds that way.
I remembered how much I liked just listening, observing, soaking. I became grateful that I could be outside even with what felt like a million things to do. I appreciated I could move my body to stay healthy. And I was especially grateful to do the one thing I really wanted: catch my breath.
Racing thoughts (and dogs) don’t allow for gratitude. When I made the moment my happy place, I didn’t get as upset with Lola. After all, she was being present, sniffing every corner. Watching her not care made me not care…as much.
I won’t go full cheesy and say the present is a gift but being present is definitely not as passive as us overachievers like to villainize it as.
So whether you take morning walks to escape work, get more steps in, or just don’t take walks at all, make sure that when you’re doing something for you, it’s not about meeting a quota, accomplishment, or checking a box. It’s about enjoying where you are and who you are. The where you’re headed can wait a couple more minutes.
What are some ways you stay present? Share some doggo stories if necessary! Comment below.
P.S. Walking is especially great for us anxiety and C-PTSD folks. It helps us regulate and realign. It grounds us (pun intended).
